This is the story of being called, late at night, to come to a remote home and open a house safe. Sounds legit.
You know that way that police officers have of talking – that blunt and brief, yet buzzword filled deadpan understatement? If there’s a crazy guy, dancing naked on Main Street and stopping traffic by shooting roman candles at people – all you’ll hear over the radio will be – “Disturbance, Main Street.”
That Police Deadpan was what kept our tech from thinking this late call was just weird trouble. Our after hour calls go to whichever tech is on-call, not just a message machine or call service, so they get a firsthand feel, directly from the caller, about what the problem is. Yes, we’ve had some weird calls where people claim to have “permission” to get into a house, car or store and want Advanced Lock and Security to “let” them in.
This call was different. After the odd (outlandish) request, there was only silence; that expectant Officer silence that somehow only leaves space for a Yes answer. With a few job details – gain entry to a house safe – and an address – you’ll see the lights – our tech, Mike Schell, set off. He’s a seasoned pro and knows a job from a joke.
At the remote address, the driveway was easy to miss but the lights weren’t. If these lights were inside, you’d have thought it was quite a party: swinging beams of blue and red, bright white spotlights and blinding LED arrays pulsing a squinting glare. This was outside though, and – for someone inside – the party was over.
“Is he still here?” Mike said, as he got out of his truck and met the first of many officers on scene. “Don’t worry,” was the (unsurprisingly) blunt reply.
There was a gauntlet of police and (can’t say which) agency officers leading into the large home. Mike is impressively capable and so often has a Not Worried smile on his face. With his small kit in hand, the look he got back, because of his easy smile in the middle of this tense situation, was one of confusion and suspicion – “what is this guy smiling about?” was the broadcast thought. Also, they’d seen the safe and so thought that Mike’s calm ease was unwarranted and to be soon ended.
Have you seen Mike open a safe? Now, we’re not saying he can open any and every safe quickly and without problem, but I wouldn’t bet against him. The pictures to the left there are from a commercial safe opening Mike did – where it was daytime – and not a live crime scene. He makes it look easy.
Mike was lead to the safe and set down his tools for a look. In the short time it took him to lay out his tools and get organized, a ring of stern and curious officers formed around him – and began taking pictures. Um, ok.
How would you feel, if you were asked to do your job, surrounded by a dozen armed officers – that were taking pictures of everything you did? Still breathing heavy from the tension of the raid, all officers lean in as Mike goes to work. Spirals of hardened steel curl from the hole and flick to the floor, trailing wisps of blue smoke.
Then it seems that nothing is happening: Mike is crouched, unmoving, the drill is grinding away, and the leaning officers are all intently watching. Just as there is a subtle click that only Mike can hear, the drill stops. All twelve armed officers lean further. Mike slowly swings the door of the safe open to reveal –
Mike stood up, with that smile on his face, to the stunned surprise of all the gathered officers. It had been only minutes since Mike had begun.
There are some universal truths to cracking a safe, there are a lot of different types of safes. These Universal Truths (no, we’re not going to tell you) are scattered and applied to those so many different safe types – that you’ve really got to know what you’re doing to do it well and make it look easy. Mike has earned his Not Worried smile, he wears it well and he brought it out special for this occasion.
His favorite part of the night? “I didn’t have to clean up. They wouldn’t let me. Evidence.”
What was in the safe? It was full of
